Hopeful

The past week or so I've been in some kind of weird funk. I've just been really wired and anxious and depressed. Yesterday it was so bad that I literally almost couldn't get out of bed. I was angry because I didn't want to get up and go to school, I had a test and I wanted to lay around all day. And it didn't go well, at all, but I suppose we could attribute some of that to me being a negative nancy. Either way, I just didn't want to be like that. When I get sucked into that kind of negative thinking and behavior, it doesn't stop after a few days. It snowballs until I'm crying all the time and not doing any schoolwork and barely functioning. I didn't want to allow it to get like that...so I took control and I didn't let it.

Today, instead of just giving in and skipping my one and only class on Tuesday, I got up and went to school. Then I came home, ate, had a little bit of computer and TV time, then picked up Mae and we went to the library so we could both do some studying. It was really productive and I'm so glad we went. I don't really have any homework besides reading and studying, so I just spent time reading my book that I have to read for US History and taking notes on it so when it comes time to write my report, I have notes and page numbers to reference for it. Then I read half of my chapter for abnormal psych, and a bit of the book I'm reading for Psych too. And I managed to have an enjoyable time with Mae while I did it, too, without getting very distracted.

I felt really good about it all, like I'm taking control instead of letting my negative behavior, attitude and thinking control me and what I do and how I perform, academically.

Also, I think Mae and I found halloween costumes. Thing one and Thing two. It's gonna be awesome. =]